7 years

It was 7 years ago today when I first took ill. It was a normal day woke up it was my day off work so I had a lie in. Did my house work and was feeling fine. Had planned to go to the pub for a drink with my friend Billy. I went to meet her out of Burger King where she worked. I went into the restaurant and she noticed I wasn't looking to good. She made me go to the bathroom. I collapsed on the floor and ended up in hospital.

While I was there they found out I had a brain hemorrhage. They managed to make me stable and I was air lifted to Nottingham Queens Medical Centre. I died twice in the helicopter. I have been told by my boss at the time that she came to see me in hospital and I told her I wouldn't be in work the next day.

After about 3 months in Nottingham I was brought back to Leicester. I spent several months in a normal ward then was transferred to the Leicester Younger Disabled Unit. I was in a wheel chair at this time and was unable to walk. Whilst at the YDU I learnt to walk again and had to visit different specialists such as the Psychologist and Speech Therapist.

The Neurologist said that it is ghley higly unlikley that I would ever work again. I was only 24 24 at time. Now I am trying to get my story across and try to help other people as well as myself. The Department of Works and Pensions have said despite the fact I have 2 tumours on the brain due to my Neurofibromatosis I am not disabled enough to get the higher rates. Because of my health problems no company would be able to employ me. This government would rather I lived in poverty so they can save some money. I have had comments like I am lazy and greedy. This comes from a person who grew up on benefits. .

I attended Headway Leicester for while after leaving hospital. They helped me to settle in a place of my home and send me on a couple of college course. They also helped me to get my benefits.

I try to do some volunteer work once a week at Christchurch in Leicester this is a lunch club for pensioners. This tires me out doing just 3-4 hours roughly. I wouldn't be able to manage a full time job. I also have had comments like I have the net and a phone I don't need them. As a disabled person a phone is essential to me in case I take ill and the net is the way I communicate with people and make new friends. What other people see as luxuries to the disabled person it is a necessity.

I am again seeking legal adivce about my benefits. I have been told by several people including my own MP Sir Peter Soulsby, that they think that I should be on the higher rates. The DWP have said I am not able to work yet they are saying im not disabled enough to get the higher rates. I now have the support of my local councilor Ross Grant.

I dont choose to be disabled I dont think that anybody would. I would love to be able to go out and work again. That way I wouldnt get comments like im being greedy or lazy.

Most of my family go out and work and it seems that I am the only one not able to. I have to watch every single penny I get coming in. Sometimes my account gets overdrawn and my accoun accours charges.

The government are now going to cut benefits for people yet again. Will we be going back to Victorian times and having poor houses. Pick Pocketing is susposed to be illegal yet with the government cutting peoples money surely thats what they are doing? More people will be turning to crime to be able to live. Then again I suspose that people would be better off in prison. They would get 3 meals a day, no bills to pay and more human rights.

Acceptance

Children seem to be more accepting of disabled people than adults. I go to visit my friends and their daughter Shannon runs up to me and gives me a hug. She doesn’t care about anything I have wrong with me. She just wants me to play with her.

With my condition Neurofibromatosis, it causes me to have tumours all over my body. She asked me why are you so spotty. She’s only 5 years old. I explained to her in simple terms and that was that.

It’s the adult population who change the kid’s minds. Children don’t see the wheelchair they seem to see the person that is in it. If people teach their kids to accept others more then they will grow up understanding everybody is different.

Just because a person looks different on the outside or has different abilities they still have feelings. I remember a quote from somewhere I forget where, “if you cut me do I not bleed”. A disabled person still has feelings. Disabled people are not second class citizens if you got to know them you may find that you have things in common with them.

It’s the same with people of different races and sexuality. In this day and age most countries are multicultural and have people with different sexual preferences. If a child is brought up to accept this as normal then they will grow up to treat all people the same.

I don’t see a person for their colour or sexuality I just see them for the person they are. Why should a person be judged for being different to his neighbour or friend?

News Article

I read a news article today passed on to me by friend. This gentleman had major brain surgery and the DWP expected him to go back to work 2 weeks later.

pa.press.net, Updated: 03/08/2010 06:56
Brain op man told to return to work
A man has received an apology after his benefits were stopped by officials who he claims told him he was well enough to return to work just days after having brain surgery.

Bryan Haigh, 50, from Leeds, underwent the major operation to remove a tumour from his brain on July 20. He said bosses at the Department for Work and Pensions decreed in a letter dated July 22 that he was officially fit to work and they could stop his £65-a-week benefits.

But a spokeswoman for the Department for Work and Pensions said: "Having reviewed the case, we have arranged for Mr Haigh's Employment and Support Allowance to continue. We have contacted him to apologise and inform him of his future payments. If anyone is unhappy with a benefit decision they should get in touch with Jobcentre Plus, and we will look at it again."

The next thing they will be trying to force me back to work. There is already 2.5 million people not working in the uk, if they dpeople who are to sick to work where are they saving money in the end.

Update

Again I reapplied for Disability Living Allowance at the middle rates. Again I have been turned down. In basic terms because I have coping methods it makes me less disabled. They don't take into account I can never work again.

I have also lost some of my housing and council tax benefit. They seem to let Asylum seekers have no trouble having money, yet people who have lived in the country all their lives get shafted. In London an asylum seeker gets paid £2000 a week in housing benefit, after being moved from a house only costing £800 a week housing benefit because she didn't like the area. I am not a racist but they need to think about the people in this country who need help first before helping others.

There is people who get high rate disability for having an addiction or just being depressed. If they have an addiction surely giving them more money gives them more money to spend on it. If someone is depressed, they should go out and get a job perhaps that would stop them feeling so depressed.

I have been told by people to stop complaining and be grateful for for what I get. If I could work I would are they or anybody out there, willing to find me a job that I can do for 3 hours a week for a full weeks wages then I would work.

I read in a news paper about a war hero who lost a leg. He has been told hes not entitled to some benefits. This is completely wrong. He was fighting for our freedom he deserves all the help he can get.

This government and the last seem to think if you can cope your not entitled to help. It needs sorting!

Helping Other People

If a person has got something to offer no matter what the age of the person then they should do so. We can all learn new things from each other. I have been reading a 14 year old girls blog about her life with Neurofibromatosis.

Her blog is refreshing to have a younger persons view on the condition. I like to share information with as many people as possible. That's why I started this blog. If one persons views are changed by it then I'm happy. You can learn just as much from a young person than an adult.


I have been getting negative opinions about my disabilities. The people in question seem to make comments without doing any research of their own. If I make statements or say something I always research it first to make sure I have my facts right.

It is dangerous just to assume something is right in your eyes. If someone is going to comment on someones way of life, they should make sure they have the facts first. You can do more damage just speaking without thinking than just taking a moment to think before you speak.

Benefit Changes

Following recent releases from the Government and the DWP it has become clear that they intend on making it far more difficult to successfully claim Income Related Benefit's.

This will be partly done by forcing sick and disabled people back into work by working out exactly what they believe those people would be capable of doing. Many Welfare and Disabled charities have shown contempt and dread at these prospect's pointing out that sick and disabled people in the work place poses a real risk of injury to both themselves and others. Not to mention the probability that forcing such people back to work to early, or when they are clearly unable, will only aggravate their conditions causing them to go back onto sick and disabled benefit's; if they can get them.

So what happen's if they can't? It's simple really; they will simply plunge even further into poverty, possibly losing their homes and maybe even loved one's because of the mental and financial stress it would put on the family structure. Either that, or they will have to work, making their health even worse and possibly end up in an early grave. I could be critical and say that the Government would welcome this because of saving's to the NHS and the Welfare System, but then that could get me in trouble, lol. But this is how it comes across. A kind of discreet Social Genocide, and if any Government personal are reading this don't bother suing because I ain't got nothing, lol. Unfortunately it looks as if it won't matter which party is in power after the election as both major parties look set to cut welfare and reduce the number of people claiming them.

Britain has the highest rate of Sick and Disabled benefit claimant's in Europe but maybe they should start looking at the reason's behind this. It is not necessarily down to people being "work shy", but more to do with the poor quality of living standard's in many communities like overcrowding or housing that poses a health hazard to their occupant's. This is the link to crime too! Instead of throwing money at constant welfare research and reform they should pump it into improving the quality of living for so many of Britain's citizens. Only this can improve people's health, where applicable, and will eventually bare fruit in the form of less people off work sick and improved life for all. Those saving's could then be put into improving the lives of disabled people by providing better services and standard of care as well as making the job of carer's much easier.

The problem is those in a position of power have mostly lived a financially stable life and have never had to learn how to live on nothing. Program's life "Tower Block of Commons" on channel 4 have tried to address this matter and in my own personal opinion, very successfully. Politicians who have volunteered to participate in the program have finally seen just how difficult it is to live of state benefit's and are also beginning to realise that the majority of those people DO NOT do so through laziness or simply to get some "free" cash. Of course there are those who choose not to work but they are in the minority and at a time when unemployed people out number available job's by as much as 10 to 1, it is both irresponsible and unfair to label unemployed people in such a manner. If you haven't yet seen this program on channel 4 I would definitely recommend it. You can view the episodes here;

http://www.channel4.com/programmes/tower-block-of-commons/4od#series-1

So let's see where some of that wasted money is going. The following research probably cost the tax payer more than your average sick or disabled person per year, and show's how the Government and the DWP see falling number's in those claiming Income Related benefit's. One of the most frightening of which is the one on Pension Credit. If they think our mature citizens will not be claiming the money on which they depend, just where exactly will it be coming from. You surely can't expect these people to work,....can you?!

http://www.dwp.gov.uk/docs/projections-of-entitlement-to-incomerelatedbenefitsjune2008.pdf

With thanks to Steven Preece for sending this to me.

New Blog

I'm going to start this blog of with a poem from Rudyard Kipling

If

If you can keep your head when all about you
Are losing theirs and blaming it on you;
If you can trust yourself when all men doubt you,
But make allowance for their doubting too;
If you can wait and not be tired by waiting,
Or, being lied about, don't deal in lies,
Or, being hated, don't give way to hating,
And yet don't look too good, nor talk too wise;

If you can dream - and not make dreams your master;
If you can think - and not make thoughts your aim;
If you can meet with triumph and disaster
And treat those two imposters just the same;
If you can bear to hear the truth you've spoken
Twisted by knaves to make a trap for fools,
Or watch the things you gave your life to broken,
And stoop and build 'em up with worn out tools;

If you can make one heap of all your winnings
And risk it on one turn of pitch-and-toss,
And lose, and start again at your beginnings
And never breath a word about your loss;
If you can force your heart and nerve and sinew
To serve your turn long after they are gone,
And so hold on when there is nothing in you
Except the Will which says to them: "Hold on";

If you can talk with crowds and keep your virtue,
Or walk with kings - nor lose the common touch;
If neither foes nor loving friends can hurt you;
If all men count with you, but none too much;
If you can fill the unforgiving minute
With sixty seconds' worth of distance run -
Yours is the Earth and everything that's in it,
And - which is more - you'll be a Man my son!

What I think Kipling is trying to say is that if you try your hardest then you should be proud of your self.

I was thinking the other day about all these servicemen and women who go to war for us and come back injured. They do not complain, yet they do not get treated with the respect they deserve.

A lot of these people will never be able to work again but they still keep smiling. I read in a newspaper about one serviceman. This man had lost both legs in a mortar attack. He now has prosthetic legs. The gentleman wants to go back to the front line. This we all should be proud of.

I feel guilty because of the fact that I cannot work. I complain about not getting enough help from the government when ex servicemen hardly get any help at all.

There should be equallity for all. Everyone has the right to be treated with a bit of dignity.

New blog time.  Ive not written one for a while so I thought that I would do one. I want to talk about the was disabled people are portrayed on TV.

Firstly I want to talk about the show on Channel 4 called Cast offs.  This show is excellent. It is a drama based on a reality show of disabed people on a desert island.  All of the actors on this show have genuine disabilities and are  showed in a sympathetic light.  They have a wide range of people in the show with different difficulties.  It shows that people with a disability can learn to cope in extreme situations.  Like I have said before though  learning to cope an adapt doesnt make you less disabled.

In Eastenders they have a character who is in a wheel chair the actor is genuinely in a wheel chair and is not an actor in one.  They also have a little boy who is deaf in the show and deaf in real life.  In Emerdale there is a blind lady which is played by a genuine blind actress. 

The show Tracy Beaker has a character in it with Cerebral Palsy.  She has the condition in real life.

There still needs to be more disabled people on TV.   There was uproar in the UK because they had a childrens presenter with one arm.  I don't see the problem with it.  If your child asks questions then they are only curious and its better for them to learn to accept people.   It would stop a lot of bullying in schools because a person seems different to them. 

Being disabled doesnt make you any less normal it just means you have different challenges in life to other people.

More Prejudice

One of my previous posts has been taken from my blog and disected. I have copied it below and will add the link so you can see its not edited. I will give my comments to it afterwards.

moaning bully

i read something today that my internet bully wrote an i found it very funny to read how he moaning about being disabled .. here is what he said ..











"I visited the job centre today. I had a look at the available jobs. There is nothing suitable what so ever for me. When you apply for a job legally you have to tell them of any risks that you would be to the company.

Companies cannot refuse you employment because you are disabled. But with my health there are not many jobs I can do.



I would need to be happy in a job that I did. What is the point of doing a job if it makes you unhappy? If I wasn't happy in the job, surely that would make me even more ill. "

now i do fine what he said very funny .. cause he is not really wanting a job.... if he did he would try harder for a job.. an if i was in debt of £360 something with the conical i would take any job i could get.. to get out of that deft ...if you are that stressed i would suggest that u take anything u can get an stop complain about what u are not getting



"I am already starting to get stressed about money. Yes I have the net but that is not a luxury to me its a necessary. A lot of people with disabilities find the net is good for them to communicate with the outside world. "

well let me say this about the net an you .. if u are that stressed are u worried about being caught out being a bully what u get off on bullying 2 woman in over 2 years .. dose that give u a hard on simon north .. it must cause if your that horny why not talk to your mate dave.. he know all the porn an dating sites.. he can hook u up with a woman ...

if u can sit on a chat site for hour at a time or on the pc bullying i think u can get a job sitting down...

"I recently went for a night out. This was my first in about 8 months and I had to save for that. Most people of my age are out nearly every weekend if they don't have families. "

well simon north .. u truly do have a lot of crap u say ... now this is out right lie cause u went out on not to long ago .. as u have bragged about it ....

"I know the content of my blogs is random but when I have things running through my head I just need to put them down"






well simon north all i can say to u is wake up u was found fit your doctor an the medcail... stop moaning about how u are not being treated right .. there is many thing u can do out there .. stop being picky an take what u can get.....

an u plast all over the internet " why work when the govement pay me not to "

Here is the link.



This person and others see that if a person looks normal on the outside they are lazy and fit to work.

If she spent one afteroon in a Headway she would see this is not the case. I have to concetrate really hard to do normal things and it makes me very tired. She said that I should stop being picky would she rather i did job that would make me even more ill? She doesnt work herself yet she feels she has the right to preach about other peoples situations.

incensed

I had to post this today as I am extremely pissed off. I have received a letter saying that I owe £396 back payment of rent. The government have decided that even though they are giving me less money to live on I can afford to pay £18.50 a week rent.

This is on top of all my other bills as stated in previous blogs.

In there eyes I'm not disabled enough to get financial help. Yet I am not fit to work. Where is the logic in that.

As I have said before I have 2 brain tumours. What part of being fit to work is that? If I came of the boat not speaking a word of English I would have more rights. I would love to be able to go out and work but i'm physically not able to.

There are cases out there of people claiming money that they are not entitled to and get away with it. This government needs to sort them out first before penalising the rest of us.

When I was in hospital they thought I wouldn't live that long. I'm still here now but each day is a struggle. Some days I have good days, some are bad. Because I have learnt to adapt so I can manage in life. In the DWP I am less disabled.

The person in a wheel chair who still has all their faculties IE its only a problem with their legs, They can still work in an office yes. But there are people like me who have internal problems who get neglected.

The conservatives want to get people on incapacity off the sick and on to income support to save the government money if they get in would that include people like me?

Disability

Just because a person looks "normal" on the out side doesn't mean they are normal on the inside.I appear normal on the outside but on the inside is where the problems lie.

People with certain conditions get a raw deal. The government would rather get everyone into work to save money. They do not think about the long term. If like the government preferred, everyone worked it would cost them billions in hospital costs.

When I was fit and able to work the manager employed someone on a trial with downs syndrome. The company I worked at had n problem employing disabled people. I have been told by someone I can sit on my computer so henceforth I can get a job. If I worked now I would find it very hard. I do a bit of volunteer work now and I struggle after 3 hours. People say im just lazy but I have to work twice as hard as most people. That's what makes me tired.

I already feel useless that I have nothing to contribute, but when people snipe about it that hurts more. I would love to be able to make a difference to at least one persons life but I cant. I did want to try and do a degree just to prove to people I may be disabled but im not thick.

People think having a brain injury means that you have mental health problems. That is not always true. It sometimes means you have to try a lot harder to do basic things.

Prejudice

Last night I had a conversation, well I was given abuse by some woman.

She said that because the government have decided that I'm not entitled to the right rates in her opinion I'm not disabled. She seems to think that because I can type I can work.

If I was fit to work I would be by now. Its not that I don't contribute anything to society because I do. I volunteer at a lunch club for pensioners. I may not be able to contribute financially but I try to do my bit.

There is different types of disabilities out there, some people can go to work with some you cannot. Would people rather everyone worked and ended up even more sick and costing more long term?

Just because a person looks normal on the outside doesn't mean everything is ok on the inside. I have stated before that I have a brain injury. If did try to do a full time job I wouldn't last a week. When you pass a person in the street you don't know if they are disabled or not.

It frustrates me when people have the negative attitude against disabled people. Especially when they don't work themselves. I was dating someone after my brain injury and the girls mum told her she had to end it as I wasn't good enough cos I couldn't work. This was from a single mum who hadn't done a days work in her life.

Why should disabled people be treated like second class citizens?

More Government Stupidity

Just  to prove its not just me getting  a raw deal with this government read the article from The Mirror news paper below

Woman refused disability benefits - in case amputated leg "gets better" By Paul Byrne 29/08/2009

A diabetic woman whose badly-infected leg was amputated has been refused disability benefits - in case it "got better".

Former nurse Beryl Prescott, 57, was told to reapply in three months, when it would be decided if she was genuinely disabled.

Beryl said: "Apparently, you have to wait three months after you come out of hospital before you can apply in case you 'get better".

"I'm not a doctor but I am pretty sure that's not going to happen. I don't have a magic grow-bag."

She added: "I am not a fraudster, I'm not trying it on. I am a 100% genuine case. I have a prosthetic leg."

Partially-sighted Beryl had her leg amputated in January. She applied for Disability Living Allowance (DLA) from her hospital bed, but was told it would be a three-month wait before her claim was even processed.

Beryl, from Crossens, near Southport, Merseyside, said: "It sickens me that you do your best and pay your bills all your life and then you get treated with no respect."

The Government insists on a three-month qualifying period before awarding DLA. Claimants must be unable or nearly unable to walk due to a permanent disability, the loss of one or both limbs, or being partially sighted.

A spokesman for the Department of Work and Pensions, which has given Beryl more than £1,700 in back payments, said: "We cannot comment on individual cases."

There are different types of disability as well.  Yes I can walk but slowly and have to compose myself every so often.  But I get tired very easy so would be unfit to work.   I get dizzy when I bend down and could black out.   I have to really know an area to be alone there.   I get confused sometimes.  I dont want sympathy I just want to get on with my life with some dignity.

When you look in the mirror
What do you see
Do you see a waste of space
Or the man I could be


Yes I have no purpose
I sit bored every day
Because I cannot work
Well so the dr does say

That short poem I wrote is basically how im feeling. I shouldnt I know but when you cannot contribute anything to life, you start to feel useless.

Disabled people are not useless. A lot of people with disabilities have things to offer. Just because a person has got limitations or its not safe for them to work they might have skills other people dont.

Dont stare at a person because they look different. Ask them questions. Most disabled people dont mind questions. It educates people. That way it makes people more tollerant of others.

My home town of leicester recently hosted the special olympics. The visitors were all welcomed with open arms. This was plesantly surprising.

No 2 people on this planet are the same so treat everyone as a human being.

Humanity

Disabled people have no rights. Disabled people are not allowed to be happy, Disabled people are all just lazy and could work if they wanted too.

These are some of the comments I have had when I explained i am disabled. We are all human. Just because a person has difficulties doing things doesn't make them any less off a person.

I have had the attitude "you can sit on your backside all day you can get a job with computers".

I sit down most of the day because it makes me ill to stand for a long time. I find myself getting tired sometimes after being awake for a couple of hours. Society would rather I worked then made my self ill. Surely this would cost the UK government more?

The disabled are people as well if you cut us do we not bleed? Just because a person faces different challenges in life to survive doesn't make them less human..

I'm a 30 year old man who can never work again It already frustrates me as when friends phone me up to invite me out, I cannot afford to go. I'm losing more friends by the day. I asked my doctor to help me with my benefit situation, he had the attitude cut down on drinking beer then. I wish I could afford to drink beer it might take some of the monotony of life away

Everybody has the right to be treated with respect.

Money

I have a challenge.

I would like to see any of the british MPs live on £105 a week and see how they cope I don't choose to be in my situation I can never work again so only get incapacity and low rate DLA. Keith Vaz claimed that its necessary to claim £500 for 22 cushions. Yet they say you can manage on low incomes. They want shops to put the prices up for food as well to cut down waste.

What about people like me because I'm borderline, I'm only entitled to lower rates and I am now living in poverty. You will say he can afford the net and that's a luxury, but its a necessity to me and to a lot of disabled people. I am already isolated due to my disability and now my money has been cut I have become even more so.

Most of the friends I have left live in luxury. I don't care about luxury I just want to be able to live a little more comfortable. I will never be able to afford a decent holiday. I have to save up for a year just to go out for a couple of drinks now with friends. I'm losing friends because I am becoming more reclusive.

I'm 30 now and will never work again. Ive faced facts that I will never be able to buy my own property and I will never have children because I wont be able to provide for them. When there is so many people already living in poverty in this country why do we have an open door policy. There are 2.4 million people unemployed in this country. I am unfit to work with 2 brain tumours and people who are fit to work seem to get more help.

I don't want sympathy I just want to get on with my life. But with the government keep cutting my money crime seems the best way out my predicament.

I'm gonna start blogging here about living with a disability. In September 2003 I had a brain haemorrhage When they did an MRI scan they found that I had 2 brain tumours. I can never work again because of this.

Last year I had to reapply for disability living allowance. I had this rejected. I went to Community Legal Advice in Leicester, they managed to get me the lower rates. I need the rates I was on before to manage to live. I was on middle rate care and high rate mobility.

Because of this I lose my income support and I'm just on low rate DLA and incapacity. This means they expect me to pay council tax some rent and for my prescriptions. This is unfair.

If I was an asylum seeker or committed crimes I would be treated better than I do now. Because I can walk but slowly and I have learnt to adapt I'm worse off.

It makes a man want to go out and get himself arrested just so he has more rights.

Just because a person learns to adjust there way of life so they cope it doesn't make them any less disabled. People will tell me to get a job, but would it be better of that I worked and ended up in hospital costing more. Or paying me that little bit more just so I could survive.